parenting

Motherhood and self-love

Motherhood is an amazing and wonderful experience, but it can be challenging at the same time.
Motherhood is one of the toughest jobs in the world.

When you are a mother, you cannot take a break and you don’t even get paid 😀
Many women around the world are expected to bounce back immediately after pregnancy, comparing them to other women who snapped back immediately after giving birth.

People don’t understand that all women are not the same.
When I had my second child, it was a difficult time for me because i had an emergency c-section delivery (story for another day), and i could not move around the way i did when i had my first child. Some people could not understand that i had to take care of a newborn ( who never accepted being bottle-fed) and a 17 months old toddler.
These people made things worse when they started calling me a fat woman. They expected me to have a toned and terrific body within weeks of giving birth. It was so depressing for me………these people will just open their mouth and say “ Bukky see how you are fat, you need to reduce the amount of food you are eating” As if they lived with me mtcheew. They didn’t know what i was going through, or the challenges i was facing as a mom of two babies, who just had a traumatic unplanned c-section delivery. I started hating my body, i lost confidence in myself, i felt ugly, and i never wanted to look at the mirror. My family members didn’t notice what was going on with me because i never wanted to share my problems with anyone, not even with my husband because he was always telling me i am beautiful and i wasn’t fat. I didn’t believe him because i thought he was saying those words to me just because i am his wife.
With the help of some inspirational teachings and reading so many articles about self-appreciation, i started to regain my self-confidence and self-esteem. I said to myself “ Bukola, you are beautiful no matter what”. I started working out because of me and not because someone called me fat. I was aiming to live a healthier life, and lose some kilos for myself and not for anyone else. It wasn’t easy!!! Determination is the key.
When i started to lose weight “nko”? Some people started saying you are looking hungry Bukola, stop losing weight. 😀 😀 There are still parts of my body i don’t really like, like my arms and tummy, but i have embraced the transformational changes in my post partum body; and i am enjoying how curvy i am.
People will always complain if you are skinny, chubby or whatsoever. Just love yourself no matter what size you are. Self Love is fundamental and that doesn’t make you egocentric.
Kindly share your thoughts with me in the comment section.
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One love

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23 Comments

  1. Maryse

    June 22, 2018 at 8:09 pm

    Hai ragione cara la gente parlerà sempre e pensa che non è facile per una donna dare la vita è poi ti trovi con le suocere che ti dicono sempre che sei ingrassata . Io sto bene così e amo il mio corpo. Mamma di due figli

    1. bukolaorry

      June 22, 2018 at 8:42 pm

      Ma veramente! Per loro dopo aver partorito devi dimagrire subito!! È assurdo! Grazie per il commento. Un abbraccio

  2. immanuelethephotoartist

    June 23, 2018 at 6:34 am

    This is great article…. more ideas

    1. bukolaorry

      June 23, 2018 at 10:54 am

      Thank you Immanuele

  3. emmanuel

    June 23, 2018 at 10:34 am

    Wow… great article, more inspiration.

  4. indianeskitchen

    June 24, 2018 at 5:51 pm

    You are one smart woman! We all need to think like you do!

    1. bukolaorry

      June 24, 2018 at 3:53 pm

      Thank you so much ❤

  5. theblackbeauty

    June 25, 2018 at 3:39 am

    You look amazing! Don’t let anyone tell you or make you feel otherwise. Great post dear.

    1. bukolaorry

      June 25, 2018 at 4:24 am

      Thank you ❤

  6. Ossy Frank

    June 27, 2018 at 1:40 pm

    You are beautiful and strong and intelligent. Self confidence is one of the key ingredients in attaining success though others words might affect us directly or indirectly. Thank God you regained yourself confidence. Nice article…

    1. bukolaorry

      June 27, 2018 at 11:42 am

      Thank you very much! ❤

  7. OJ's Pride

    July 7, 2018 at 12:36 pm

    This is so true. If care is not cautiously taken such pressure/body shaming leads to postpartum depression

    1. bukolaorry

      July 7, 2018 at 4:40 pm

      Exactly dear!

  8. Ozioma Paul

    July 9, 2018 at 1:03 pm

    You are beautiful just the way you are!
    I wish people know the damage their words do. They’d say way less…. if only they knew. I honestly wonder why one’s weight is a community concern… everyone notices and suddenly becomes an expert *rolling my eyes*
    Thanks for sharing this 🙂

    1. bukolaorry

      July 9, 2018 at 1:41 pm

      Thank you so much dear! 💕

  9. Stacy N. Elliott

    August 26, 2018 at 1:04 pm

    You ARE beautiful! In the eyes of your children, they will always love their beautiful Momma. Keep up the positive self talk!

    1. bukolaorry

      August 26, 2018 at 1:37 pm

      Thank you very much! This mean a lot ❤

  10. abigailaryeh

    September 8, 2018 at 10:53 pm

    Well done

  11. yinkadeniyi

    December 24, 2018 at 10:38 pm

    Thank you for sharing.❤️

  12. Temi

    July 25, 2019 at 5:18 am

    Yup. Many time, those closest to us say the most insensitive things. You are beautiful!

    1. bukolaorry

      July 25, 2019 at 7:22 am

      Thank you so much❤❤

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